I Knew I Should Have Slept In Today!
by Prezaurian
Summary: My first fic, I WILL fix format if it kills me! Two people get stranded in DBZ's hell. Goku & company go rescue them.
1. Default Chapter Title

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the DB/Z/GT characters. They are not mine, they belong to Akira Toryama (did I spell that right?)/and associates/or Funimation. Please don't sue me, I'm not making any money off of this. I'm just doing this fan fic for entertainment. I do own the characters Celine and Zoe, they're mine because I created them. Chelsee belongs to herself; I don't even want to try claiming another person. It's too dangerous. 

Author's Note: This is my very first attempt at writing anything for entertainment. My brain forced me to do it. I want to thank Chelsee for writing the "Endangered Saiyans" series. When I read it on the other Fan Fiction Network (now closed down) it gave me the inspiration for my story. It is NOT a copy of anyone else's work. By the way, this story is written mainly in a first person viewpoint. I also WANT comments. Please, I want to see if what I did was worth anything, thank you. 

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I bolted towards the meeting place in the park. Kuso! I was late again. "I knew I should have gotten up earlier!" I panted to myself as I spit out the strands of red hair that kept getting into my mouth. I was supposed to meet Zoe and the others for a trip to the local anime store. We had planned on wasting our money on anime videos our parents disapproved of. 

As I neared the meeting place I slowed to a jog. The only person there was Zoe. 

"I also should have known I wasn't going to be late. Those guys are always sleeping in! Hey Zoe! I see we're the only one's stupid enough to get up early for these meetings." Zoe waved and nodded in agreement with my statement. 

"Yeah," Zoe laughed, "I would have slept in too, except for the really strange dreams I've been having lately." 

"Really? What're they about?" I asked because I had also been having some rather odd dreams and I was curious to see if her dreams were anything like mine. 

Zoe looked kind of embarrassed about answering that one. So like any real friend I bugged her about it until she spilled. 

"Well...they're about...," she replied hesitantly. 

I rolled my eyes. "Come on Zoe, you know I won't laugh." 

"Um, wellitwasaboutdragonballz," she finally spat out. 

"What? What did you say? I may be able to speed read but I can't speed hear." At my comment Zoe looked rather...pissed off. I grinned, "Sorry Zoe." 

"Fine Miss What," Zoe drawled, "I said I've been having weird dreams about Dragon Ball Z. I also woke up this morning feeling pretty strange." 

"Really?" I commented, "I've been having strange dreams too, but that's probably 'cause we watch too much of the stuff." This was unusual. I'd been having strange DBZ dreams and I'd also woken up this morning feeling odd. I shrugged, it was probably nothing though; just my rampant imagination. I looked over at Zoe; she looked really nervous about something. Then I felt it, the air was vibrating and slowly growing warmer. 

"Um, Celine?" quavered Zoe, "Do you feel that?" 

I nodded, unable to speak for a few moments. "Yea, I feel it." 

"What is it?" 

"How the hell should I know!?" I snapped. "Let's move from this spot, it's creeping me out." 

Before we could move it happened. The air began to vibrate violently and the temperature shot up rapidly. I didn't know what was going on so I braced myself for whatever was happening. A bright flash engulfed us and when I opened my eyes I cursed to myself. I knew I should have slept in today. I wasn't in Kansas anymore (so to speak). I was in some sort of strange forest. I looked around. Zoe wasn't anywhere to be seen and I found that I was wearing some sort of odd bracelet. 

A loud crashing sound to the left assaulted my ears. Whatever caused the noise sounded big. As the thing crashed into view I found, to my immense horror, that it was. I did the only sensible thing my 19-year-old brain could think of. I ran screaming for my life. 

****** 

"Huh?" Goku looked up from his sparring session with Vegeta. Vegeta of course, took the opportunity to knee Goku in the gut. "Hey Vegeta! Stop for a second!" a startled Goku yelled. 

"NEVER KAKAROTT!" shouted the irate Saiyan Prince. Vegeta recommenced whaling on Goku with enthusiasm (not that much of it was having any effect on Goku). This could and would have gone on all day; however, the reason Goku had said "Huh?" in the first place was getting impatient. 

"STOP IT AND SHUT UP BOTH OF YOU!!!!" King Kai yelled into their heads, giving both of the warriors really bad migraines. 

As Vegeta grimaced Goku spoke up. "Hey King Kai, what's up?" This comment caused Vegeta to look slightly alarmed. 

"The sky, moon, stars, birds, satellites,...," King Kai droned. Vegeta groaned and gave Goku a look that would have made an onion cry. Goku looked slightly chagrined and interrupted King Kai before Vegeta could take his anger out on some helpless bystander. "Hey King Kai, what's...." Vegeta glared at Goku. "Err...what's happening King Kai?" 

"Oh, you need to go to Hell (AKA HFIL) and retrieve two living people," replied King Kai. 

"WHAT!?" exclaimed Vegeta. "Why should we...err, I have to go to that worm hole and help this moron retrieve two MORE morons!? Screw this! I have better things to do than go with a BAKA to a place FULL OF BAKAS to get TWO MORE BAKAS!" 

At this outburst King Kai paused and then quickly continued, "Um, you have to retrieve them for three reasons. One, they are from a parallel universe. Two, they're alive. Third and final, people that are alive, from a parallel universe, and stuck in Hell tend to mess up the fabric of space and time." 

"Meaning what exactly," growled Vegeta. 

"MEANING THE UNIVERSE COULD FALL APART IF THEY'RE LEFT THERE YOU TWIT!" King Kai screamed. 

"Oh," replied Goku and Vegeta (yea, Goku was listening in, but "wisely" not saying anything until now). 

"Well how long have these two people been in Hell King Kai?" asked Goku. 

"They've been there for a month." 

"A MONTH! AND YOU ONLY THOUGHT TO TELL US NOW!" shouted Vegeta incredulously. He closed his eyes and muttered darkly, "Why me? Why do I have to be surrounded by these fools?" 

While Vegeta was mumbling and groaning to himself King Kai explained how he was going to send Goku, Vegeta, and a couple of the other guys to retrieve the two "hapless" people stranded in Hell. 

****** 

Much later, Goku, Vegeta, Gohan, Goten, and Trunks are waiting for King Kai to send them on their way. Goku was smiling (idiotically as always) and Gohan was waiting very patiently for King Kai to get on with it. Meanwhile Vegeta was grumbling about the whole thing while the VERY hyper Goten and Trunks were zipping around and driving everyone else nuts. 

"Oh good, I see you brought a rather strong group. Because Hell is filled with very strong and nasty beings," King Kai commented. 

Vegeta was about to snap out a rude comment when Gohan interrupted. "We know King Kai, after all, we did send most of the really "nasty" beings there. We can handle it." Meanwhile Vegeta continued to fume; mainly because he wanted to say something really nasty to King Kai. 

"Two more things; one, don't kill the people you're there to get. It would have nasty consequences. Number two, each of the two people you're rescuing have on a single bracelet with Saiyan writing on it. Everyone got that? Yes? Okay then, let's get the show on the road." With that King Kai transported the group to Hell. 

****** 

Upon arriving in Hell the group glanced around at their surroundings. After taking this brief look around the group slowly, but surely, started staring at Vegeta. 

"What are you boobs looking at!?" snapped Vegeta. 

"Well, Uncle Vegeta (at this the rest of the group snickered and Vegeta snarled) you've been here before and we haven't," piped Goten. Vegeta blinked. 

"Oh, and I suppose YOU want ME to be your tour guide!" he sneered. 

Before anyone could reply a shriek pierced the air. The group watched as a girl with brown hair and a rather panicked look bolted by. 

"What was that all about?" asked Goku. His answer soon came as Turles flashed by, hot on the heels of the poor girl. 

"We have to save her!" shouted Vegeta. Everyone stared at him as though he'd suddenly mutated and grown another head. "Err...she had on one of those bracelets!" replied Vegeta nervously, "Turles is going to kill and eat her or something!" Everyone continued to stare. "Look!" snapped Vegeta, "I don't know about you guys, but I don't feel like croaking just because Turles kills that girl and this universe collapses!" This everyone understood; Vegeta's self-preservation instinct. They had thought for a few seconds that Vegeta had actually had a humanitarian feeling towards another living being. After the odd moment was over the group took off after Turles and the girl. 

The next few minutes were filled with screams, explosions, grunts, and groans as the group mercilessly beat up Turles. After the dust settled poor Turles was laying on the ground trying to figure out where his spleen was (not literally). Some of the more ruthless members (i.e. Vegeta) of the group wanted to get rid of Turles but that was impossible due to the fact that he was already dead (they are in Hell after all). Goten and Trunks were the first to go over and talk to the girl they had just helped save. 

"Hello!" they chimed, "What's your name?" 

"Um, my name is Zoe," replied the brown haired girl, "Thanks for the save." She stared in astonishment. She couldn't believe what she was seeing. First, a villain from Dragon Ball Z; and now a whole cluster of some of her favorite characters suddenly appear and save her life. She continued to stare, not really knowing what else to say. 

Zoe's staring was starting to creep the kids out. Not only was she really quiet, she was staring at them with big, saucer eyes. Trunks was the first to speak up. "Um...I'm Trunks, and this is my best friend Goten." The kids were uncomfortable with the staring so they shrugged and returned it. They thought she looked kind of strange. Before they could voice their opinion of her looks (and cause all Hell to break loose) the rest of the group approached. 

"Hello," Goku and Gohan greeted her cheerfully. 

"Hmph," was Vegeta's only response. 

After the introductions Gohan explained to Zoe what had happened to her. 

"So you mean I've been transported from my universe to the Hell of this universe?" Zoe asked. 

"Yup, pretty much," Gohan replied. 

While this was going on Vegeta had been eyeing the bracelet on Zoe's wrist. "Let me see that bracelet," Vegeta snarled as he grabbed Zoe's wrist to look more closely at the bracelet. 

"What does it say Vegeta?" asked Goku. 

"Shut up Kakarott and let me read it," snapped Vegeta. He quickly scanned the writing on the bracelet while Zoe squirmed. Then, unexpectedly, he started to laugh. "I can't believe it!" 

"Huh? Believe what?" asked Goku. 

Vegeta snickered. "This bracelet is something like a contract or bargain. In order for the wearer to escape Hell they have to take someone with them who has died and ended up here. It also says that if the wearer dies of unnatural causes after they have been taken out of Hell the person that was brought back gets sent back to this dump." 

"What!?" shouted a very panicked Zoe. "You mean I have to pick up some psychopath to get out of here?" Zoe looked slightly queasy at the thought. "Um, can't I just stay here?" she squeaked. 

Gohan shook his head. "You can't stay here, it would disrupt the fabric of space and time. It would endanger too many people to just leave you here." 

"Oh," Zoe squeaked again. She resigned herself to her fate and asked one final question. "How am I supposed to pick someone from this horrible place then?" 

"You aren't," commented Vegeta, "I'm going to pick for you, otherwise we'll never get out of this dump. Females can never make up their pea-brained minds quickly." He then started to look around for a potential candidate to bring back. 

"What!?" spluttered Zoe. "You can't do this! I...I...have...." Zoe shut up after a nasty look from Vegeta. She promptly told herself that he wasn't one of her favorite characters anymore. 

As Vegeta looked around Zoe complained to several other members of the group but to no avail. She was just trying to get Goku to understand "why" she didn't want Vegeta to pick for her when the aforementioned Saiyan found what he wanted. 

"All right, you're taking him with you," snapped Vegeta as he pointed to a very dazed Turles. "And I also don't want to hear one word of complaint from you or else," Vegeta said in a low threatening tone. With that Zoe shut up again and just stood there listening to the group. 

"Okay, so we've found the first person," commented Goku. "Let's go look for the second." This said and done the group headed off after a brief argument on which way to go. 

After a couple hours of cruising around aimlessly the group heard the sounds of a battle. "Let's go see what's up!" shouted Goku eagerly. He then bolted off in the direction the sounds were coming from. Gohan looked at Vegeta, shrugged, and the two followed after the fast disappearing Goku. Meanwhile Goten and Trunks dragged an unwilling Zoe and Turles after the rest of the group. 

The sounds of battle had stopped by the time everyone had reached Goku. As they reached him they found he was staring up at a spot a couple hundred yards in the air in front of them. When they looked to where Goku was looking the group was shocked (well, actually they were a little surprised, NOT shocked). 

They saw a girl with rather long, wild (not messy), red hair hovering in the air. But that wasn't what was surprising. She was turned away from them and holding a rather limp Jeice of the Ginyu Force by the back of his armor while the rest of the Force was laying on the ground unconscious (C. Ginyu isn't there because he is still a frong back on the DBZ gang's earth). Suddenly Zoe's eyes widened. 

"Celine!?" 

****** 

I turned my head towards the noise. I couldn't quite believe it, I'd heard my name. I hadn't met anyone in this dump that had known my name. The only person I knew of that could possibly know my name and be here was Zoe. I turned around completely. "Hey Zoe, long time no see," I grinned as I started gathering energy. Hey, just because my best bud shows up doesn't mean I wouldn't fry the scum I had in my hands. Goku (yea, I knew his name, Zoe's not the only one who watched DBZ) noticed me gathering energy. 

"Put him down," Goku said. He looked determined that I shouldn't fry Jeice. 

"Why? He's scum, he should fry." I didn't understand why Goku always wanted to show mercy to the bad guys. So after a not so small argument with him (Vegeta surprisingly or maybe not so surprisingly took my side), I dropped Jeice. To my amusement he made a dull thud/splat on the ground below. I floated down and introduced myself to the rest of the group. That's when I heard the funniest sounding comment. 

"Wow Celine! You look a lot older since I saw you last!" blurted Zoe. 

This comment from her startled me and I pointed out what was to me, an obvious fact. "Look Zoe, we've been stuck here for five years, of course I'm going to look older!" 

"No you haven't," replied Gohan calmly. 

"What do you mean I haven't? Are you saying that we haven't been stuck here for five years?" I growled. "I've been in a damn forest surviving the attacks of monsters for five years and now your telling me that I haven't!?" I was seriously pissed. I didn't like it when people implied that I was a liar. 

"I...uh...no, I'm not calling you a liar. It's just that you've only been stuck down here for a month," replied a slightly ruffled Gohan. 

My verbal assault of Gohan prompted Zoe to defend his statement (he's her favorite character). "I've only been here for a month so you can't say Gohan's lying!" 

At this Vegeta started to laugh. "You bakas! I suppose the rumors about this place are true!" 

"What rumors?" blurted Goku. 

Vegeta snorted. "How would a moron like you understand these things? (I reminded myself to thank Goku for asking that question so I wouldn't have had to ask Vegeta and have him focus his attention on me.) I heard rumors that this place had areas in it where time passed faster than it does normally. Those areas wouldn't effect someone that was dead but would wreak havoc with someone that was alive!" Vegeta laughed again. 

He continued to laugh until Goku pointed to the bracelet around my wrist. "We'll have to do something about that bracelet too. Vegeta, could you translate what it says?" 

I had to interrupt then. "Don't bother, I already know what it says." 

"WHAT!" shouted the incredulous Saiyan Prince. "You couldn't possibly know what it says! It's written in Saiyan!" 

"Wanna bet?" I grinned. I was enjoying his shocked look. "On my world this is a spoken language. My mom taught it to me. It's spoken by people in the country she's from." 

Still looking rather stunned Vegeta mumbled something like, "How could that be?" and walked away from the group. 

Goku interrupted the moment by asking me how I had beaten the Ginyu Force with a power level of only 2,000. 

I laughed at this. "I didn't beat them. They beat themselves!" 

"Huh?" was Goku's only response. 

Because I was feeling nice I decided to elaborate a bit more on what had happened. "Oh, I found out during my time in that forest that I have a rather interesting ability. I found I can absorb ki blasts. When they tried to blow me away I simply absorbed the blasts and redirected them. That's how I was able to beat the Ginyu Force. I've also found that I can change the form of the energy I absorb. For example, I can take energy used for an attack and turn it into healing energy." 

"Cool," laughed Trunks. 

"Yea, I think so," I replied. 

While this conversation was going on Vegeta recovered his composure and soon came stomping over (he was still pissed off). "Well? Can we get this over with? I'd like to get back to some more important stuff!" he barked at us. 

"Sure," I replied, "but I want to pick someone with a power level that is the same as mine." 

"Why?" asked Gohan curiously. 

"Why? Because I want someone to spar with! I want to have something to do while I'm on your Earth!" 

"Good idea Celine! I'll help you find someone," Goku exclaimed. 

Gohan rolled his eyes at his dad's remark and Zoe simply goggled at my idea. As Goku used his power to sense other's ki Zoe came over and asked me if it was such a good idea. "Celine, do you really think you should be doing this? I mean, why do you want to spar with someone any ways?" 

"I just said why Zoe. We're going to their Earth. I don't know much about what we can do once we get there so I'm going to make sure I have something to keep me busy when we're there. Plus, from what I've seen of DBZ I know we'll need some survival skills. I mean, some powerful being is always threatening the place and I want to be strong enough to at least be able to survive," I told her quietly. 

Zoe looked shocked. "That forest didn't just change your age Celine, your different than from when I last saw you," she muttered. 

Goku interrupted our conversation by suddenly shouting, "Found one!" 

"Where?" I asked as I walked over to him. 

He grinned (damn, the guy was so cheerful it made my eyeteeth ache) and gestured in the direction my future "sparring" partner was. Goten and Trunks picked up Zoe and Turles again and we all flew off in the direction that Goku had pointed. After about half an hour of cruising Goku slowed down a bit more (he was already going slow so the rest of us could keep up) and pointed to a person in a small clearing below. 

I grinned at what I saw. A rather muscular guy a little taller than Goku was leaning against a rock in the clearing. That isn't what helped me identify him though. His hair is what did that. Wild (not messy), black, longer than my waist length hair (down to his knees for crying out loud!), and an exaggerated widows peak. I almost laughed out loud as I recognized him. Raditz. 

Now that Goku had found someone the problem was how to get him to agree to be my sparring partner. While I was thinking about this Vegeta zoomed down and landed right in front of Raditz. "So your the one we're taking back with us," Vegeta sneered. 

Raditz looked alarmed and took a step back. "Huh!?" 

Vegeta snorted. "Now I know your related to Kakarott! We're taking you with us so we can get out of this place!" 

Raditz still looked confused as the rest of us glided down. He looked away from Vegeta and glanced at us. He sneered when he saw Zoe and myself (yeah, he's sexist too) and when he saw Goku he snarled and bristled (almost literally). He obviously couldn't sense power levels or he would have shut up instantly. 

I rolled my eyes and casually commented, "Hey Raditz, you wanna live again?" 

He snapped his gaze back towards me. I doubt even his respect for Vegeta would have kept him from reacting to those words. "What!? Of course I want to live again wench!" 

I grinned, I could tell this wasn't going to be a smooth partnership. But I could live with that. "All right Radish, take a look at this bracelet," I said as I flashed the aforementioned item in front of his face. 

He glared at me before reading the bracelet around my wrist. I watched his face as he read and saw his eyes widen in something like shock. He glanced from the bracelet to me then back to the bracelet. "What's the catch, wench?" he growled. 

"Nothing much," I answered, "I just want a sparring partner when we get back to the land of the living." 

"WHAT!?" he exploded, "You want me to be your baby-sitter!?" 

I narrowed my eyes and socked him in the stomach hard enough to let him know I could hurt him. "No," I drawled, "I want you to be a sparring partner, NOT a baby-sitter." 

He glanced up from his bent over position (meanwhile Vegeta was laughing his ass off and everyone else was trying not to). He looked impressed to a VERY small degree and I thought I saw a tiny glimmer of respect in his eyes (of course this could have been my imagination). "Fine," he hissed from between his teeth, "I'll be your sparring partner. Anything to be alive again." With that he straightened up and joined our "little" group. 

"So how are we getting out of here?" Raditz grudgingly asked. 

Gohan grimaced, he didn't exactly like his uncle or Turles. Nor did he like the idea of them coming back to life. "We have to get to King Kai's place so he can send us back to Earth. To do that we have to go to the Spirit Checking Station and from there travel to the end of Snake Way." 

"All right!" exclaimed Goku, "Let's go. I know a shortcut (remember how he got out of Hell when he fell off Snake Way?) out of here!" 

"Ha! So you're finally good for something after all Kakarott!" Vegeta smirked. 

Goku grinned at the remark and sped off at top speed in the direction of his shortcut. We had little choice but to follow him as best we could. 

****** 

Goku's shortcut led us directly to the Spirit Checking Station; or more appropriately to the inside of King Yama's desk. After shouting at us for interrupting his work he gave us a guide and a minivan; then ushered us out of his office. 

As the guide showed the way to the beginning of Snake Way he made small talk. After a couple minutes of his drivel we reached our destination. What happened next was not to be believed. 

The guide looked over our group and commented, "The van can only seat eight people. Someone is going to have to sit on someone's lap." 

I think at that point we all blinked stupidly at the same time. Unfortunately that blankness didn't last. My only question is why do males always looks at females and new people in these situations? They focused their attention on Zoe first (thank Kame!). 

Zoe's eyes widened. "NO WAY! I'm NOT sitting on Turles' lap! Err...besides, he's still too injured for me to sit on his lap!" 

Goku shrugged, "Well, if Turles is too sore for that..." 

Vegeta smirked maliciously at this and turned to look at me. 

"Uh-Uh! I don't think so! Vegeta, there is NO way I'm sitting on Raditz's lap. One, it would put me in a vulnerable position; and two, it's embarrassing!" 

"Okay," replied Goku. He glanced at Vegeta. "Vegeta, would y-..." 

"WHAT!? Kakarott, have you lost your mind!?" Vegeta shouted at the top of his lungs. 

"But Vegeta, I w-...," Goku tried to continue. 

"Kakarott!! I am NOT going to sit on someone's lap! Are you nuts or something!? I'd rather sit on the van's roof for the entire trip than sit on someone's lap!!" Vegeta yelled. He then flew off and landed on the van's roof while muttering about how Goku was a complete pervert. 

"But all I was going to say was if he would mind if I just had Goten sit on my lap," murmured Goku. 

The rest of us stayed quiet during this conversation. We didn't want to get dragged into a possibly violent confrontation between Goku and Vegeta. 

With the "crisis" over Gohan finally spoke up. "Okay guys, I'm driving." 

"But I wanted to drive! I finally learned how," whined Goku. 

Gohan eyed his father. "Dad, not to be rude or anything but...I don't trust you behind the wheel." 

Goku looked slightly deflated and then perked up. "I get shotgun!" he shouted. This prompted another argument. This time between Goten, Trunks, and Goku. The kids had also wanted shotgun; but being older Goku got it his way. The kids looked disappointed for a couple minutes and then started to grin and laugh again. For some reason this worried me, although I wasn't sure why. 

Zoe piped up next. "I'm not sitting next to Turles or Raditz!" 

"And we're sitting with each other!" shouted Goten and Trunks in unison. 

I shrugged. "Okay, I'll sit next to Turles and Raditz. How bad could it be?" 

After settling the seating arrangements we piled into the minivan. Gohan was behind the wheel while Goku had shotgun. Zoe was sitting between Goten and Trunks in the middle set of seats. Raditz sat in the back set of seats between Turles and myself; and of course Vegeta was settled on the roof of the minivan. 

Once everyone was settled Gohan called out, "Everyone ready?" 

"Shut up and let's go!" shouted Vegeta. 

Gohan flushed, revved up the van, and off we went. 

****** 


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the DB/Z/GT characters. They are not mine, they belong to Akira Toryama (someone tell me if I spelled that right)/and associates/or Funimation. "It's a Small World After All" belongs to Disney (I think). Please don't sue me, I'm not making any money off of this. I'm just doing this fan fic for entertainment. I do own the characters Celine and Zoe, they're mine because I created them. Chelsee belongs to herself; I don't even want to try claiming another person. It's too dangerous. 

Author's Note: This is my very first attempt at writing anything for entertainment. My brain forced me to do it. Amazingly (and annoyingly) it took me almost three months to finish this thing! It is NOT a copy of anyone else's work. By the way, this story is written mainly in a first person viewpoint (and there is out of characterness). I also WANT comments. Please, I want to see if what I wrote is any good, thank you. 

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(We left off with the gang heading off down Snake Way to King Kai's place.) 

A hundred miles later I groaned to myself. I should never have volunteered to sit next to Raditz and Turles. I mean, these guys don't seem to know the meaning of bathing regularly. Not only that, these two guys are BIG. I was squished against the side of the minivan because they were taking up all the space in the back. I squirmed trying to find a more comfortable position. Damn it! Why didn't King Yama give us a minivan with a WORKING air conditioner? 

"Hey Goku! Could you roll the back windows down?" I called out. 

"Sure Celine!" he replied cheerily. Goku scratched his head and looked over the many buttons on the van's console. He shrugged and pushed one randomly. The middle seat promptly started to move back. 

"AUGGGGHHHHH!" everyone in the back seat screamed. "STOP! You're squashing our legs!!" 

Goku jerked his hand away from the button as though he'd been burned. "Sorry," he grinned sheepishly. He looked again for a button to roll the windows down. Goku looked chagrined. "I can't find one. I don't think those windows were meant to roll down." 

I growled in frustration and screamed. "These windows are going DOWN!" I promptly vaporized the window next to me with an energy blast and hung my head out to gasp for air. This was going to be one long trip. 

****** 

About a thousand miles later (long road isn't it?) it started again. I liked Raditz's hair; but not when it was falling all over me. It was warm enough without a blanket of his hair on my lap. 

I growled, "Get your hair offa me Radish." 

He narrowed his eyes. "You get off of my hair wench," he snarled right back. 

I think both of our nerves were getting frazzled. Otherwise I might have enjoyed him and his hair sitting next to me. Before we came to blows a horrible screeching assaulted our ears. 

Goten and Trunks had started to sing. I think this was their idea of revenge. "It's a small world after all...," they sang at the top of their lungs. 

I felt sorry for Zoe. I mean, she was sitting right between the two monsters. That is, I felt sorry for her until she started to sing along with them. 

"It's a small world after all...," they howled out. 

"I don't know anymore words to that song," Zoe yelled above the din. 

I almost sighed in relief; until they chose a new song to sing. Their choice? The song that doesn't end. I'm sure everyone knows the lyrics to THAT monstrosity of a song. 

"This is the song that doesn't end...," they screeched. 

I slumped down in my seat while Turles and Raditz tried covering their ears. The fact that Goku and Gohan joined in made it far worse. The combined heat, lack of space, body odor, and bad voices combined with bad song lyrics tore it. I bolted out the open window as though I'd been struck by lightening and flew to the top of the van. 

"Move over Vegeta! I'm sitting up here too and there's nothin' you can do about it!" I shrieked frantically. 

I must have looked like a psycho at that moment because Vegeta goggled, recovered, and then shouted down at Gohan and Goku. After a brief discussion/argument I agreed to sit back inside on two conditions. One, there would be NO more singing. Two, we would have rest stops every one hundred miles. Out of the entire group only Raditz, Turles, Vegeta, and myself liked these conditions (go figure, the rest of the group are cheerful loons). 

****** 

At the twentieth rest stop of our "journey" I left the van again. I had to do stretches at every rest stop otherwise I'd flip out. That van is really cramped in the back seat; especially because of those two muscle-bound bakas. 

I'd started doing leg stretches when Vegeta challenged Goku to a sparring match. 

"Great idea Vegeta!" Goku turned to look at the rest of us. "Hey guys! Let's all spar, it'll limber us up!" 

Gohan interrupted, "I'll sit this one out. I have to stay fit so I can keep driving." 

Goku shrugged, "Okay Gohan; but you don't know what your missing." 

Gohan rolled his eyes at this remark. "No ki blasts!" he warned, "We don't want to damage Snake Way!" 

Zoe shook her head and refused to spar. "I'm not that strong and I don't feel like being turned into a blood smear." 

This left the rest of us to pick sparring partners. Vegeta and Goku had already decided they were going to fight each other (of course); and Goten and Trunks decided they were going to join forces and fight Turles who was feeling better by now. 

I looked over at Raditz and grinned. "Looks like we're stuck fighting each other Radish." 

"HA! Bring it on wench," he snapped. 

We squared off and looked each other over. Out of the corner of my eye I saw the others already going at it. I focused my attention back on Raditz. 

"I'm going to grind you into the dust and show you the proper behavior a female should have towards males," Raditz snarled. 

"Shut up and fight Radish!" I retorted. 

I shifted into a fighting stance. To tell the truth I was kind of nervous. I had beaten the Ginyu Force using ki blasts. I wasn't sure of my hand-to-hand combat skills. Not only that, Raditz was a lot more experienced in fighting than I was. 

I decided to make the first move. I lunged at him and was promptly smashed into the road. I rolled away and leapt up. 

"That the best you can do?" I taunted. 

Raditz snarled and flew down; fists first. That's when the real sparring began. Fists and feet flew and blood splattered. I may not have been experienced but I made up for it in originality and the fact that he'd never seen me fight before. It wasn't enough. While I was off balance from a missed punch he tripped me and I fell...hard. Before I could recover and get up he pinned me. Well, almost. I had gotten one of my knees up in time. 

So there we were. Me, flat on my back and him (with my knee against his chest) trying to pin my arms down completely. 

We were so absorbed in our match that we hadn't noticed everyone else was done with their sparring. At least, we didn't notice until Turles spoke up. 

"Raditz, what are you trying to do? Consummate her as your mate?" Turles burst out laughing. 

We froze and Raditz flushed so red he almost looked like Jeice. 

I laughed, "I guess the match is over Radish." 

He growled and we both got up. As we headed back to the van I dusted myself off and smirked. "That sparring worked, I feel limber already." 

Raditz rubbed a bruised cheek, rolled his eyes, and snorted. 

I laughed again. I was going to enjoy our future sparring matches on the DBZ Earth. 

We piled back into the minivan and continued on our way. Fortunately the rest of the trip along Snake Way was uneventful (anymore events and we would have all needed first aid). We arrived at King Kai's place a few days later without incident. 

****** 

"Hey King Kai, could you help me contact ChiChi? I want to tell her we're having company over for dinner," Goku asked. 

"Fine, fine, I'll help you contact her; but you know I don't like telepathically linking you and HER. It gives me a headache," griped King Kai. 

While Goku got chewed out by ChiChi the rest of us waited. Goten and Trunks started to play tag with Bubbles and Gregory, and the rest of us just sat around doing nothing. Talking was NOT an option with this group. 

I looked around. Vegeta was meditating and Gohan was watching the kids play tag. Zoe was looking up at the clouds in the sky. Turles was pulling up grass stalks and poking Raditz with them. Raditz couldn't do anything about this so he was pulling up grass blades one at a time and examining them (now that's bored!). 

Okay, I was bored out of my mind and full of energy. This is a very bad combination. Especially in me, I tend to act like a complete loon at times like this. 

I got up and casually started to walk around. I smirked, I was bored and Raditz had bugged me with his sexist comments and the fact that he had almost beaten me in our first sparring match. I figured I could get rid of my boredom and get revenge at the same time. 

I moved around until I was behind Raditz and stretched. I smiled, he didn't have a clue and no one else had noticed me. This was going to be too easy. I crouched and then took off at a dead run. I was about six feet away from him when I launched myself into a flying tackle. 

"GAK!" was Raditz's only response when I hit him from behind. I swear it was the most beautiful sound I'd ever heard. Pulled up grass scattered into the air like confetti as we tumbled away from where he'd been sitting. Turles looked stunned, he'd blinked and when he opened his eyes Raditz had vanished. 

"You BITCH!" Raditz roared as we both tumbled over the ground. He started to struggle violently. 

"I love you too Radish," I laughed. I grinned and bit him to complete my revenge. He screamed more in anger than anything else. I pushed away from him with my hands and landed on my feet a couple yards away. My goal wasn't to beat him, far from it. I wanted to embarrass him a little. From what I saw, it seemed to have worked. 

Raditz looked like he was about to burst. I wasn't too worried though. He couldn't do anything to me that I couldn't walk away from. If he did he'd end up dead again. 

Turles looked at Raditz and started to laugh. "Raditz, you look like you have a hickey where she bit you!" Then he looked at me. "What was that Celine? A love bite?" 

I grumbled. My revenge had unfortunate consequences. Turles was going to be an extreme pain in the butt in the future (saying this Saiyan behaved in an unusual manner was an understatement). I couldn't do anything about it and neither could Raditz. Neither of us were strong enough to make Turles shut up and he knew it. 

I walked over to Raditz. He glared at Turles and myself; then started to shake the grass out of his hair. I nudged him. "Hey Raditz, does Turles bother you?" 

"What do you think?" he retorted. 

"Yes," I replied, "What do you say we call a truce and instead of beat each other up just train together?" I didn't like saying this because it sounded weak; but I liked Turles' taunting even less. 

Raditz sneered, looked like he was about to say something then paused. "You want to get stronger so you can stand up to Turles?" he accused. 

"Give the Saiyan a cigar!" I retorted. 

He glowered at me and then smirked. "Fine, we'll train together. If "you" get stronger then so will I. Then I'll be the one that deals with Turles; a weak female like you would never stand a chance." 

I rolled my eyes at the last comment but didn't say anything. I was surprised I had even gotten him to listen to me, let alone agree with me. 

Before we could say anything else Goku came over. "Hey guys! As soon as we get back to Earth you're all invited to dinner at my place!" I think I heard a distinct rumble from the Saiyan's stomachs when Goku mentioned dinner. 

King Kai walked over then. "Well, there's one thing you must do before I send you back." 

"What's that King Kai?" asked Goku curiously. 

"Not you Goku, the newcomers. I haven't trained anyone recently and I'm bored. I want each of them to tell me a joke before I send them back. I haven't laughed in a long time and I want to before I send you guys back to Earth." 

"What!?" blurted Zoe. 

The rest of us just stared at King Kai. 

Gohan sighed, "Don't argue guys, just tell him a joke so we can go." 

Zoe shrugged. "I guess I'll go first." She thought for a few moments. Then she started. "Hickory dickory dock, three mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one," Zoe paused for effect, "and the other two escaped with minor injuries!" 

King Kai blinked and rolled over laughing. I sighed in disgust, that's our Zoe, Queen of corny jokes. 

"My turn," I stated. I waited until King Kai recovered. "When should a baker stop making donuts?" I paused for a moment. "When he gets tired of the WHOLE business!" 

I grinned, surprisingly the corny joke had worked. King Kai was rolling on the ground laughing his head off. 

Turles and Raditz hesitated. They looked uncomfortable. 

"Well? Do you want to tell a joke today or next millennium?" asked King Kai. 

"Err...we don't know any jokes," blurted Raditz dismally. 

"Then I guess I won't send you back," King Kai replied coolly. 

I gestured to Zoe and she came over. I looked over at the two Saiyans we were stuck with. "You do know we're going to have to give them jokes to tell to the fat blue guy, right?" I mumbled to Zoe. 

"I heard that!" shouted King Kai indignantly. 

I flinched. "Sorry!" 

I turned back to Zoe. She gave me a blank look. I sighed, "We can't go unless we take them remember?" She nodded and walked over to Turles and started to murmur in his ear. 

I glanced at Raditz and beckoned him over. Like any true Saiyan he stubbornly ignored me and stayed where he was. Grumbling I walked over to where he stood. "You don't know any jokes?" I asked. 

"No." 

"Would you like me to give you a joke to use?" 

Raditz stiffened. He wanted to live again, but he didn't want to admit that he needed help. Saiyan pride can be an extremely annoying obstacle in certain situations. 

I decided to make it easier. "Look," I growled, "the only reason I'm offering is because if you don't go, I don't go." 

He nodded. Self-interest was something he understood very well. 

"Good, now could you lean down? I'm not as tall as you are ya know," I retorted in mock irritation. 

He leaned down and I whispered a joke in his ear. "I know it's a corny joke, but it should work," I replied in response to the grimace he gave upon hearing the joke. 

Turles stepped up. "All right," he growled, "I'll tell a joke now." He paused, trying to choke down his embarrassment at doing something this stupid. "Why can't a bicycle stand by itself? Because it's two-tired." 

King Kai laughed and I rolled my eyes. This guy would laugh at anything. 

Raditz moved forward and spoke about as enthusiastically as Turles had. "How did the firefly feel when he ran into a fan? He was delighted." Raditz looked at the sky and muttered. "Oh Kame, I feel dirty." 

King Kai laughed once more. After he composed himself he thanked us and transported us all back to Earth. 

****** 

Goku stretched. "That was fun, we should do it again sometime." 

At this point Vegeta exploded and launched himself at Goku; cussing and swearing the entire time. 

"Are they always like that?" Zoe asked Gohan. 

Gohan sighed, "Yes." 

After Vegeta had worn himself out Goku turned towards us. "Everyone is invited to my house to eat. ChiChi says you have to be presentable though." 

"And exactly where and how are we supposed to make ourselves presentable?" I asked sarcastically. 

Goku shrugged, "I guess you guys can come over to my house and get cleaned up." 

"Great!" blurted Zoe, "I could really go for a shower right now." 

Turles and Raditz refused. They insisted that they didn't need to get cleaned up. 

"Yeah right," chirped Goten. He pinched his nose for emphasis. The rest of us laughed, but didn't press the issue. 

Vegeta barked at Trunks. "Let's go. The sooner we get ready the sooner we can eat some GOOD food. Bulma's cooking sucks!" Then the two sped off for home after Trunks had waved good bye to Goten. 

Goku turned to the rest of us, "Follow me if you want to get cleaned up," then he sped off for home. 

As we followed Goku to his home I watched the land we passed over. These guys live in a beautiful world. The air is fresher and the water looked so much cleaner. Even the animal life was more diverse. I smiled to myself, one advantage my Earth had though was the fact that it wasn't constantly being invaded by super-powered aliens. 

We descended when we reached Goku's home. ChiChi was outside waiting for us. I gulped. ChiChi was a force to be reckoned with; and she looked angry. 

"Goku! Why didn't you tell me you were going! I was worried...," ChiChi stopped lecturing Goku (Goku breathed a sigh of relief at that moment) when she caught a glimpse of Zoe and myself. She took in our tattered appearance and her eyes widened. "Oh you poor dears!" she blurted. "You look terrible. We have to get you cleaned and freshened up!" 

Zoe and I widened our eyes in dread. She was in overprotective mother mode! We scrambled around like chickens with our heads cut off before she charged and dragged us inside to get cleaned up. 

****** 


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the DB/Z/GT characters. They are not mine, they belong to Akira Toryama (spelling right? yes, no?)/and associates/or Funimation. Please don't sue me, I'm not making any money off of this. I'm just doing this fan fic for amusement. I do own the characters Celine and Zoe, they're mine because I created them. Chelsee (yes she WILL show up eventually) belongs to herself; I don't even want to try claiming another person. It's too dangerous. 

Author's Note: Thanks for reading this, but if you want to know what it says refer back to chapters one and two. Warning, out of characterness present. Please COMMENT! I appreciate it very much when you do. 

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(We left off with ChiChi dragging poor poor Celine and Zoe in to get cleaned up.) 

I fidgeted, "ChiChi, I know you mean well but...I DON'T like wearing dresses. So could you please get away from me." 

This earned me a glare from ChiChi. 

I changed tactics. "ChiChi, could I please just borrow a pair of jeans and a T-shirt? Pretty please?" I made doe eyes at her (and almost made myself gag). 

She hesitated, "Are you sure you wouldn't like to wear a nice dress?" 

"Thank you, but no thank you," I blurted. 

"All right," she answered reluctantly. She left and then returned with the aforementioned clothing items. Then she left to go torment Zoe. 

I pulled on the cloths and combed my tangled hair. Then I escaped downstairs and walked outside to wait for dinner. 

Vegeta and family were already there. So were Yamcha and Krillin. Everyone was keeping their distance from Turles and Raditz (due to the facts that they don't exactly have good relationships with each other and body odor). 

"Where's dinner?" Vegeta barked. 

"ChiChi already made it," replied Goku. 

"Then why aren't we eating?" snapped Vegeta. 

"Because ChiChi is busy tormenting Zoe," I replied in a bored tone. 

"Did I ask you baka?" Vegeta growled ominously. 

Bulma suddenly came over and shoved Vegeta over to the side. I cringed. 

"Watch it woman," Vegeta snarled at her. Bulma ignored him. 

"Do all the people from your world have teeth like that?" Bulma asked me as she peered closely at my face. 

"Huh?" I replied intelligently. 

"What! Oh Kame, don't tell me your related to Kakarott too!" exclaimed Vegeta. 

"Hey! I resent your implication that I'm related to that baka!" I shouted as I pointed to the aforementioned idiot. 

"Hmm?" Goku turned to look at us. "Did someone call me?" 

"None of your business!" Vegeta and I shouted. 

Goku blinked and hesitated. "Okay," he finally responded. 

Bulma interrupted, "HEY! I ASKED YOU A QUESTION!" 

Vegeta flinched and I snapped to attention. Bulma is also a force to be reckoned with. 

"What are you talking about? I don't know what you mean; teeth like what?" I asked in confusion. 

Bulma sighed. "I meant to ask if all the people on your world have canine teeth. The people of our world don't have teeth like that." 

"Oh!" I responded vacantly. "Yes, we all have canine teeth where I'm from." After all the strange things that had happened I was surprised I even sounded coherent. 

"Really? How interesting. I wonder how many other things are different between the humans of our two worlds. Would Zoe and yourself like to come to Capsule Corp. so we can research that?" 

"Err...I'm sorry but I really don't feel like becoming a science project. Maybe some other time, like never." 

Bulma laughed. "No, no, no! I wouldn't turn you into a science project. I only want a sample of blood from each of you to study. Besides being of scientific value it'll help us if you guys ever catch a disease from us or vice versa." 

I hesitated until I got a look from Vegeta that said, "Do it or else." 

"Um, okay. I'll come to Capsule Corp. But nothing else besides a blood sample." 

"No problem," Bulma replied cheerfully. 

With that out of the way Bulma and I continued to talk. Hey, before I was transported to La-La Land I'd been really interested in science. Bulma was the ONLY person around with any interest in the subject. We talked until ChiChi called us in for dinner. 

****** 

I sat down at the table. Boy was I glad I hadn't been standing in the doorway! The second ChiChi had called out "Dinner!" every male in the yard had stampeded into the house. 

The food looked great. I almost started drooling at the sight of such tasty looking food. Then I looked up and sighed; Raditz WAS drooling. "Males," I thought to myself in exasperation. 

Without thinking ('cause we were famished) Raditz, Turles, and myself tried to snatch up pieces of food. I say tried because there was something like a flash and three smacks in rapid succession. 

I held my hand and grimaced. Turles and Raditz were imitating my actions and ChiChi was standing there looking royally pissed off. Too late had I remembered my manners. I was embarrassed, but I hid it so no one would notice. 

"How'd you do that?" I demanded. 

"Shut up!" ChiChi snapped. "Weren't you taught any manners? You will wait until everyone is seated before you eat!" 

"Oops!" I laughed nervously. "Sorry ChiChi, five years in the wild kinda makes you forget." I flushed and rubbed the back of my neck in embarrassment. 

"That's no excuse! But I'll let it go this time. However," ChiChi glared at my two accomplices, "you two have no excuse at all!" She immediately started to abuse them with one of her lectures. 

After a few moments of the verbal assualt Raditz shot me a panicked look (yes, that's how bad ChiChi is). I smirked and averted my gaze. There was NO way I was going to directly sacrifice myself to ChiChi's wrath to save him. I thought quickly and did the first thing that came to mind. I knocked over my glass of water. 

I jumped up. "Sorry ChiChi! Let me help you clean that up." I glanced at Raditz and mouthed, "You owe me." Then I helped ChiChi clean up the spill. 

After the water was cleaned up everyone sat down and started to eat. I'll admit, ChiChi may have many faults but not knowing how to cook is not one of them. I had never seen this much food on one table in my life. 

All during the meal Raditz and Turles had been shoveling food down and glancing at Goku in a challenging manner. About halfway through the meal this behavior had escalated into an eating contest between the three. The rest of us simply watched in varying degrees of amusement and disgust. The funniest thing about it was that no matter how fast Raditz and Turles ate Goku was always a couple bites ahead. 

I turned my attention back to my food and kept eating. Ever since being in that forest and increasing in strength my appetite had grown. Eating was more important to me now that watching Raditz and Turles try to beat Goku at SOMETHING. I froze in mid-bite. Something was touching my feet. I put my fork down and glanced under the table. Yamcha was trying to play footsy with me! I looked at him and he smiled. I didn't feel like dealing with Yamcha's libido so I kicked him in the shin and watched his eyes bug out. Fortunately, no one else noticed the exchange and the rest of the meal was finished in relative peace. 

****** 

After the meal Bulma came over and handed me a capsule. 

"Thank, but what is it?" I asked her. 

She laughed. "It's a capsule house with four bedrooms. I figure you guys will need somewhere to stay." 

Zoe came over and asked Bulma the exact same question. Bulma replied with the same answer she had given me. 

"You mean we have to stay in the same house with those two guys?" Zoe asked incredulously. She paused and then spoke with resignation. "Never mind, no one ever listens to me any ways." 

Bulma continued, "Goku said you could set the capsule house up near his house." 

"Okay," I replied. I waved my thanks to Goku and left the house with Zoe. The two bakas followed us outside. 

"Where do you think you're going wench?" growled Raditz. 

"I'm going to set up this capsule house Radish. I don't know about you, but I don't feel like sleeping on the ground." 

"Weakling," sneered Raditz. 

I ignored him, picked up Zoe and flew off to find a place to put the house. Our two "pleasant" Saiyan companions continued to follow us. About a quarter mile away from the Son house I found what we were looking for. A nice clearing with a stream running by it. I set the capsule up near the stream and headed back. Raditz and Turles stayed behind. Zoe refused to stay with them so I carried her with me. 

"You really need to learn to fly," I grumbled at Zoe. 

"Easy for you to say!" she spluttered back as she choked on her own hair. 

****** 

I was tired. Sparring, arguments, and unfamiliarity had taken their toll. When I reached the Son house I found Gohan had already gone home to Videl and Pan. Even the hyperactive Goten and Trunks were out of action and passed out on the couch. The only reason I had gone back to the Son house was to ask Bulma when she'd like us to come over to give a sample of blood. 

"Tomorrow," had been Bulma's answer. She continued, "Oh by the way, get Goku to show you the way there." 

"Okay," I had replied sleepily. "I'm gonna go back to that capsule house and go to sleep. See you tomorrow." 

After that I had left, dragging Zoe with me. 

I blinked, the flight back seemed longer than before. The fact it was getting darker didn't help either. 

"Are we there yet?" whined Zoe. 

I was too tired for this. "Shut up or I'll drop you. Then you can walk there," I retorted. 

Happily enough, Zoe shut up. We arrived at the clearing a few moments later. 

I landed and dropped Zoe. As she picked herself up and spit out grass I walked into the capsule house. To my immense surprise Raditz and Turles were watching the TV with rapt attention. I ignored them and started up the stairs. 

"We've already picked rooms female," Turles calmly informed me. 

I raised an eyebrow. I must have been really tired. Turles was actually starting to sound polite. 

"Oh really?" I replied sarcastically before going upstairs. There were four rooms and two bathrooms. The arrangement was typical of most homes. Rooms arranged in pairs, a bathroom connecting each pair. I paused, an uncomfortable thought had just crossed my mind. 

"Which rooms did you pick?" I shouted downstairs. 

I heard a laugh from downstairs. "We picked one room from each pair," Turles shouted back up. 

"What!" I heard Zoe shriek in response. 

I myself was too sleepy to argue or care. "Zoe! We'll fight over room arrangements tomorrow! Leave it be until then." 

I noticed it was getting easier to tune out Zoe's ranting. I trudged into my room and locked the door behind me. The bed looked great; nice and soft. I didn't bother undressing. I just flopped in and zonked out. 

****** 

I jerked awake and blearily looked at the clock. It was 12:30! What had woken me up this late at night? 

BAM! 

I flinched, that answered my question. "Go 'way! I'm trying to sleep," I growled at the person banging on my door. 

"Celine! Please open the door!" 

Zoe sounded frantic so I dragged myself over to the door and unlocked it. I was almost bowled over as Zoe rushed into the room. She slammed the door behind her and leaned against it panting. 

"What's the problem NOW?" I grumbled at her. It would have been amusing if I hadn't been so tired. 

"There have been scratching noises at my bathroom door. I'm scared that weirdo might come in! Can I please sleep in your room?" 

Zoe's voice went up a couple octaves. I think she was about to hyperventilate. 

"Calm down Zoe," I crooned. I had to keep her from going into hysterics. "Of course you can sleep in my room. I'll sleep on the chair and you can have the bed." 

Zoe calmed down. She looked as though she was about to cry in relief. 

"Thank you!" she exclaimed. 

"Sure, think nothing of it," I yawned. I grabbed a blanket and pillow off the bed and curled up on the chair. "Now go to sleep before I knock you unconscious." 

****** 

"AAAAHHHHHHHH!" 

I snapped awake and leapt into battle stance. Unfortunately my feet got tangled in a blanket and I fell flat on my face. From my position on the floor I scanned the situation. What I saw almost made me laugh. Almost. 

Raditz had accidentally stumbled into the room by taking the wrong door in the bathroom. Zoe was screaming her head off and he looked like a deer caught in headlights. 

Turles barged in at that moment and froze at what he saw. Then he shouted, "Would you bakas conduct your bizarre mating ceremonies less loudly!? I'm trying to get some sleep!" 

That was the last straw. I broke down and started rolling on the floor laughing my ass off. After a few moments I got up and chuckled lightly. "Turles, get out of my room and go back to sleep." 

He tensed and glared at me. "Are you telling me what to do female?" 

"Yes," I growled, "I'm telling everyone to get out of my room and go to sleep. This stupidity has gone on long enough and I want to get it over with so I can go back to bed!" 

"But...," Zoe whispered hesitantly. 

"No BUTS!" I retorted ominously. 

Turles grinned for some unknown reason and left. I shoved Zoe out the door after him. 

"Celine...," she whined. 

I closed the door in her face and turned to face my last unwelcome visitor. "Out Radish." 

He smirked and stayed put. I cursed under my breath. "Radish, get out of my room now." 

He stalked over and grabbed my arm suddenly. Then leaned down and snarled, "My name is Raditz, not Radish." He paused and lazily half closed his eyes. "But I'm willing to forgive you." He watched my face and smiled. "As long as we're both up would you like to spar or something?" His smile widened at the latter. 

I froze. This guy was being way too fresh and I was so stunned I couldn't think intelligently. "Something?" I answered rather stupidly. 

"Yeah, something," Raditz breathed and leaned forward a little more. 

My rage at his impudence grew. I could vaguely feel his breath on my cheek and the warmth of a body standing next to me. I snapped, my mind went blank, and vision dissolved into a red haze. 

****** 

SMASH! 

I blinked at the sound of shattering glass and looked around as the red haze cleared. The room was a shambles. Furniture was broken, thrown around, and even flipped over. I could hardly believe how angry I had gotten and briefly wondered why I hadn't been able to control myself. I could barely remember what had happened. I glanced over at the window. It was smashed beyond recognition. Well, now I knew where the sound of breaking glass had come from. I heard a groan and went over to the obliterated window. I looked down. Raditz was picking himself out of a small crater. 

"You could have just said no," he growled. 

I grinned. "I think this was a more effective response." 

He glared up at me then flew in the open window of his room. 

I waited a few moments to make sure he wasn't coming back and sat on my bed. "At least the bed wasn't damaged too much," I muttered to myself. I leaned back and started to drift off. I hoped the rest of the night would be uneventful. 

****** 


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: (Monotonous isn't it?) I don't own any of the DB/Z/GT characters. They are not mine, they belong to Akira Toryama (is this spelling right or what?)/and associates/or Funimation. Please don't sue me, I'm not making any moola off of this. I'm just doing it for my own warped (and often amusing) imagination. I do own the characters Celine and Zoe, they're mine because I created them. Chelsee also belongs to me. YES, she's mine...I signed the papers a few days ago! So neiner neiner people! Any similarity between this story and real life is purely coincidental (if this has happened in real life I'm gonna be pretty shocked!). 

Author's Note: If you are really interested in what this note says look at Chapters 1 and 2! Plus, I would really appreciate some comments! Even if it's only from the people whose stories I've commented on. There will be out of characterness in this story! Hey Chels, hope you like the way you act in this story...if not, you can harass me later about it. 

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Morning, the sun shone through the broken window and a cool breeze ruffled the sheets. I stretched and listened. No one else was up yet. I cleaned up in the bathroom and went downstairs to raid the fridge. 

I took my food and sat down at the kitchen table. The snores that had been vibrating the house had stopped. The guys were awake. I heard a scream. So was Zoe, I thought with wry amusement. 

I ate quickly; it wasn't a good idea to have food out when there were Saiyans roaming around. After I finished eating I waited for Zoe to come downstairs. 

Turles and Raditz came thundering down the steps. Both automatically headed for the fridge (of course). 

"What! There's hardly anything in here!" Raditz exclaimed as he peered inside the stocked fridge. I rolled my eyes. 

Turles snorted. "I'm going hunting, see you weaklings later." 

I exchanged a glance with Raditz before he growled and followed Turles out the door. I remained behind to wait for Zoe. About an hour later she came downstairs. 

"C'mon and eat Zoe. We have to head over to Goku's house." 

She munched on an apple. "Why?" 

"Because we need Goku to show us the way to Capsule Corp. I told Bulma we were going to give her some blood samples. She wants to study them for some reason." 

"Oh, okay," replied Zoe. She looked and acted more like herself when the two Saiyans weren't around. After she finished eating we left. The trip to Goku's house was passed in silence. 

I landed and put Zoe down. Then I went up and knocked. Goku opened the door. 

"Hey Goku, could you show us the way to Capsule Corp.? I promised Bulma we'd go over there today." 

"Sure, just let me tell ChiChi we're going." He disappeared back into the house. 

I expected to hear shouting at any moment. Surprisingly there was only a calm murmuring. He popped out a moment later. 

"Let's go," he said cheerfully. We sped off; Goku in the lead. 

"So why exactly are you guys going to Capsule Corp.?" He looked back at us with a curious expression on his face. 

Zoe piped up before I could say anything. "We're going to give Bulma blood samples." 

"Uh, you mean with...needles?" Goku paled slightly. 

I grinned at the sight. This might actually be fun. 

****** 

Bulma opened the door. "Oh! You're here. Glad you could make it. This way to the lab and don't make any noise. I don't want Vegeta to bother us." 

Zoe shrugged at me and we followed Bulma; Goku hesitated. 

"C'mon Goku, don't be such a baby," Bulma teased. 

"I'm not!" exclaimed Goku, "It's just...." Goku trailed off, shrugged, and gave up. Then he followed after us. 

****** 

I sat down in a chair that Bulma gestured at. "Okay Bulma, pierce away," I commented and turned to look at Goku. He was starting to get pale again. "What's the matter Goku?" I grinned. 

"Nothin," he mumbled and squirmed uncomfortably. 

Bulma approached with the needle and I watched Goku from the corner of my eye. He was turning green. Just as Bulma slipped the needle into my arm I flashed a grin at Goku. This was his last straw. His eyes widened and he zipped out of the room at full speed. I laughed while Bulma finished drawing blood. Then it was Zoe's turn. I got up and went to lean against the wall to wait. After a couple minutes Zoe hopped up and I went to apologize to Goku. Hey, he was a friend; of course I was going to apologize. 

****** 

The next few months were busy. Occasionally Goku and Vegeta's families would get together and we'd go along for the ride. Zoe would often go shopping and occasionally dragged me along with her. The rest of the time Raditz and I trained and sparred. I would win about half the spars and Raditz would win the other half. Meanwhile Turles harassed and teased us and our patience with him shortened. While our tempers with Turles shrank our power levels grew. All in all it felt great. 

****** 

"Damn it!" Bulma shrieked, "What's with this blood's genetic sequence!" 

Bulma had been working on the blood sample for several weeks. Her patience was almost gone and Vegeta and Trunks had evacuated the house for their own good. 

Bulma peered at the genetic sequence map she had made. "Celine's genetics don't look right. Zoe's are almost exactly like the humans from our Earth, but Celine's are different. Her genetics are different from a human's, but at the same time they're very familiar," she mumbled to herself. She stared at the genetic print and thought for a few minutes. A realization suddenly dawned on her. "Oh Kame!" 

****** 

I grumbled. How Zoe had conned Turles, Raditz, and myself into going to the mall with her I'll never know. 

"When are we going to eat?" complained Raditz. 

I shrugged. "I dunno, maybe when Zoe is finished shopping." 

Turles groaned. "We're gonna starve to death then." 

"Would you guys stop being such weenies?" Zoe snapped. 

Our new behavior could be explained by the fact that Zoe had gotten used to the two Saiyans. After that we had all adjusted to a relatively peaceful way of living around each other. 

I elbowed Raditz. "Let's do a disappearing act. I hate shopping and I don't want to be stuck doing this all day." 

He nodded. "No objections here." 

"None here either," Turles hissed. 

We waited for Zoe to become absorbed in her shopping once more. When she did we made a break for it. We would have made it too; if Turles hadn't smacked into a girl when he turned around. 

"Hey, watch it stupid!" the girl snapped. 

Turles blinked. He was somewhat surprised and angry at this impertinent female's behavior. However, he couldn't incinerate her because Goku would kill him if he did. 

The commotion attracted Zoe's attention (thus foiling our escape entirely) and she noticed the still fuming girl. "Hey, you okay?" 

"Sure, this guy should watch where he's going though. The name's Chelsee by the way." 

Turles exploded. "I should watch where I'M going!" He promptly dissolved into spluttering gibberish. 

"Yeah," Chelsee casually replied, "but I'll let it slide, IF you take me out to eat." 

"Wha-," Turles stammered. 

"Shaddup," Chelsee snapped. She then dragged a stunned and protesting Turles away. 

Zoe stared after them. She glanced at Raditz and myself. "Should we help him?" 

"No!" we retorted simultaneously. We paused for a moment. 

"That was odd," I remarked. I continued to watch as Chelsee dragged Turles out of sight and into the mall mob. Then I turned to my friend, "Zoe, I'm sure Turles can take care of himself. He's a big Saiyan. Besides, I don't feel like helping that baka." 

"Oh, all right. Then I guess you two can finish shopping with me!" 

I cringed. Fortunately we were saved by the sudden sight and sound of Bulma using Vegeta to push through the crowd that typically inhabits the mall. 

Their voices reached our ears. They sounded like they were arguing about something. Typically, what they were arguing about couldn't be understood. 

"Stop pushing me woman!" 

"Keep going Vegeta! We have to find them." 

"We could have waited until they went back home!" Vegeta exclaimed in exasperation. 

"That would have taken too long. This is too important to wait." 

"They're right there woman! Stop pushing me!" 

I would have laughed except for the fact that Vegeta looked so frustrated that it would have been suicide to do so. "So...what brings you two to the mall?" 

"Something important," Bulma explained before Vegeta could do so rudely. "But it would be easier to explain if we left the mall." 

"Fine by me!" I gasped in relief. 

Zoe was the only one who looked disappointed as we left. 

****** 

Bulma was driving. Despite what the fan fics at home said, Bulma was a pretty good driver. ChiChi was the one you really had to worry about. 

"So what was so important that you had to drag us out of the mall?" Zoe questioned in a peeved tone. 

Bulma remained oblivious to Zoe's tone and answered. "Well, you remember the blood samples I took before?" 

"Yeah? What about them?" I asked curiously. 

Bulma hesitated. "Um...let's go to Goku's house first. Then I'll tell you." 

Her behavior was odd, but I shrugged. "Whatever suits you is fine by me." 

****** 

At the Son house Bulma gathered Goku, his sons, Vegeta, Raditz, Zoe, and myself into a group. 

"Okay," Bulma slowly started out, "about those blood samples. I found out some interesting stuff. First, you guys are both going to need an inoculation shot." 

"Sh-shot?" Goku turned pale green at the mere mention of a shot. Raditz's eyebrows shot up. He looked amused at Goku's reaction. "Turles should be here to see this," he chuckled. 

"Shut up!" Bulma snapped. She was obviously starting to feel like herself again. Once it was silent she continued, "Second, Zoe's DNA is almost exactly like the DNA of humans from our Earth." 

"Meaning she's pathetic as well," Vegeta muttered darkly. 

Bulma glared at him and continued once more. "However, Celine's DNA is..." 

"Is what?" I interrupted impatiently. 

Bulma's short fuse finally burned out. "You're part Saiyan!" she screamed in complete frustration. 

I blinked, Goku shrugged, Goten fiddled with his shirt, Gohan and Zoe stared, and Vegeta and Raditz shrieked "WHAT!?" at the top of their lungs. 

"She's part Saiyan," Bulma continued more calmly. "Her DNA is a mixture of Human and Saiyan. Not nearly as much as Gohan, Goten, or Trunks, but it's still there." 

"How is that possible?" Vegeta demanded. "She's from a different universe. One that doesn't HAVE Saiyans." 

Goku, who had looked spaced out until now, commented. "That isn't quite true Vegeta." 

Vegeta turned to glare at Goku. "What do you mean Kakarott?" Vegeta growled ominously. 

"Just because the people of Celine's Earth didn't know about Saiyans doesn't mean they don't exist there. King Kai just told me that he's been doing some research on Celine and Zoe's universe. He says he's found evidence that shows that a large group of Saiyans crash landed centuries ago on their Earth. It seems that when they found they couldn't leave they interbred with the inhabitants and blended in with the population. This resulted in a mix of pure humans and Saiyan - human hybrids (Goku sure sounds smart here doesn't he?)." 

Vegeta glanced at me. "That would explain how she is able to speak Saiyan. If what the blue insect says is true." 

Raditz looked surprised at this new revelation. "Saiyan? The wench can speak Saiyan and is "part" Saiyan?" He looked slightly dazed at the news of there being a female Saiyan around. 

"That's a great theory," I interrupted dryly, "but discounting myself, where's your proof?" 

Goku paused, looking for all the world as though he were listening to something only he could hear. Which was in fact, pretty close to the truth. He suddenly focused his attention back on me. "King Kai wants to know if there have been any major conflicts on your world." 

"Conflicts? I...uh...err...yes, there have been some "conflicts" on our world. World War I and II are a couple examples of such conflicts," I replied. 

Goku spaced out again and refocused after a couple seconds. "King Kai says that's your proof." 

After thinking about it for a moment Goku looked slightly surprised that a world could actually have World Wars. So did Bulma, Goten, and Gohan. Vegeta, Raditz, and Zoe looked indifferent to my somewhat blunt comment about World Wars. 

"Y-You've had World Wars on your planet?" Bulma stammered. She looked shocked. 

Zoe shrugged. "What's so shocking about that Bulma? It's not like warfare is such an uncommon thing. War is pretty horrible but why are you so freaked?" 

Bulma blinked. "You don't know!?" she laughed nervously. "But then how could you know? Humans...humans on our world have never had any World Wars." 

Raditz laughed. "So some humans somewhere actually do have fighting spirit. And even they need help!" Gohan glared at Raditz to shut him up. 

I sighed and shrugged. "Bulma, warfare is a part of my world's history. To Zoe and myself it's just a fact. Calm down before you blow a fuse. Any ways, the fact that I'm part Saiyan really doesn't matter to me either. It really isn't that important. By they way, when do you want to give us those shots?" 

My rapid subject change must have caught her off guard because she blinked and looked surprised. "You're right, it doesn't matter what kind of history your world has had. I guess it doesn't matter that you're part Saiyan either. Um...the shots...we can do that next week." 

"Good, I'm going out to train," I replied and walked out. 

Raditz followed. "You're not getting a head start on me wench." 

"Whatever you say Radish." 

****** 

I jerked my head to the side and felt the breeze of a fist go by. Close, very close. I punched Raditz in the jaw. He snarled and leapt away. Crouching down to lower my center of gravity I looked for an opening. None, damn him. He was getting better at defense. I smirked, hoping to get him angry enough to make a mistake. Bait taken, sucker. As he charged I leapt up and over, giving him a kick in the back just to show him how stupid his move had been. I took off into the air. The battle was getting a bit too rough for the terrain to take. Raditz picked himself off the ground and flew up to continue the "spar." 

"Wench! I'll kill you for that!" 

"Yeah right. I guess you really liked being dead didn't you?" No reply. He never could win a verbal fight. Physical yes, verbal no. He snarled and rushed forward. 

I threw a punch to welcome the one he had brought with him. Our respective fists never hit their targets. Goku had teleported in and caught them in his hands. 

"Hey guys! Did I interrupt something?" he asked innocently. 

I grinned, I was getting used to his incessant cheerfulness. "Not really Goku. What's going on?" 

"Oh, Bulma wants you and Zoe to get that...shot." Goku hesitated as he said shot. Raditz and I smirked. Well, at least he was trying not to freak at the mere sound of the word "shot." 

"Sure Goku, tell Bulma we'll be right over." I flew down to find Zoe and tell her what was up. 

****** 

Typical doctor's office. All white and metallic, I never liked the design. Or the overwhelming and omnipresent smell of disinfectant. Zoe was waiting outside and Bulma was prepping my arm for the injection. 

"So Bulma, exactly what's in this shot?" 

"Oh, just the usual vaccines. Just in case you guys are vulnerable to anything from our world." She smiled. "I'm just glad you don't thrash around like Goku when he's here." 

I nodded and looked around the office some more. If I listened hard enough I could almost hear Zoe grumbling under her breath about having to get a shot. I finally focused on the scenery just outside the window. 

"Oops!" 

I snapped my attention back to Bulma. "Oops?" I growled. 

****** 

"Rrraaaaagggghhhhhh!" 

Zoe stiffened and then jumped up at the sound of the roar-like scream. "What the..." She pushed open the door to the office and froze. 

****** 

I growled low in my throat and shot a look at the sound of the door opening. My eyes narrowed. 

"Celine! What are you doing!?" 

"Something I should have a long time ago, insect." 

"Celine," Zoe pleaded, "stop it, we're your friends. Don't you remember?" 

I bared my teeth at the insignificant creature that dared speak to me. "You are worthless and weak. You are nothing. Your only worth to me is the worth of prey to a predator. And the prey dies so that the hunter may live." I turned back to the other creature huddled against the wall and raised my fist. Lashing downward I suddenly froze, my fist a scant inch from Bulma's face. I sensed something and reality snapped back into place. What the hell was I doing? I looked down at Bulma and then over at Zoe. They were afraid...afraid of me. They reeked of fear. I almost gagged on it's stink and blasted through the roof to escape. 

****** 

Zoe stared in amazement at the hole in the roof. "What just happened?" 

Bulma grimaced. "I made a mistake with the shot I gave her. Instead of giving her the inoculation shot I accidentally gave her a shot of the blood sample I took from her before." 

"So? What's in a blood sample that would do that?" 

Bulma blinked and tried to compose herself. "It wasn't exactly the original blood sample. I tinkered with the genetics of it. I brought the Saiyan genetics out of dormancy and put a tiny amount of growth hormone in the solution. It was only for an experiment, but I accidentally injected Celine with it. Now I don't know what's going to happen to her." 

"So it's not her fault she's acting like this?" 

"No." 

"That's good, for a sec there I thought she had completely wigged out." 

"We still have to look for her." 

"Why?" 

Bulma looked at the ceiling and pointed to the hole. "Does that answer your question Zoe?" 

****** 

The wind roared past my ears. What had I done? I had almost killed two of my friends. I snarled in anger and frustration. What had that shot done to me? A wave of heat followed by a wave of ice raced through my body. I alternated between sweating and shivering. What had I been infected with? I gasped as intense pain ripped through me. I couldn't maintain flight; I crumpled and fell into the forest below. 

Branches rushed past my eyes and twigs and leaves snapped off from my passage. I was barely able to exert enough power to keep myself from crashing into the ground. As I touched down I fell and started to thrash. Pain crashed over me in waves. It felt as though someone were peeling my skin away with a hot, dull blade. I clenched my jaw. I would NOT scream or cry out. To do so would be the ultimate weakness. Finally, exhausted and aching I let the quiet darkness claim me. 

****** 

I opened my eyes blearily. Where was I? What had happened? I shakily stood up and braced myself for the pain. None came, which was a relief. I remembered what had happened when I was last conscious and shuddered. My main concern now was to find out how long I'd been out. Then I would clean up and go apologize. 

I moved gingerly. Kuso! My entire body felt like somebody used it for a football. I lifted off and headed for home. 

I cruised along slowly to conserve my energy and strength. I was about halfway home and pondering what had happened when my instincts suddenly jerked me to the side. I flinched as the heat of an enormous ki blast rushed past me. Twisting around I saw the least welcome sight in all the universe. Vegeta, blood shot eyes and veins pulsing. To say he was raging would have been a royal understatement. 

"You BITCH!" 

I flinched, exactly what I had done to make him mad I don't know. I just knew, whatever it was, I would never do it again. If I actually lived long enough to find out what it was that I had done. I opened my mouth to explain. Vegeta blurred out of sight. Crap. I twisted around to try and block what I already knew was coming. Too slow, way too slow. Two clenched fists smashed into the back of my neck, stunning and smashing me into the earth. I tried to scramble up. He sped down and lifted me off my feet by the throat. I tried prying his fingers away, but it was hopeless. It was like trying to pull of bands of steel. He squeezed and dug his fingers in. I choked and kicked, I was going to die. 

"What did you do to my mate?" 

I blinked and struggled. He squeezed again. "Nothing!" I gasped. I wasn't getting enough air, and my sight was growing dim. He loosened his grip slightly so that I could take in a few shallow breaths. 

"Liar!" he snarled. "You tried to kill her!" 

"No!" I panicked. He wasn't even listening to me. "I would never hit a pre-," I clicked my teeth together. 

"What?" his eyes widened and he shook me. 

"I said I would never hit a pretty good friend like Bulma!" I lamely replied. Bulma would kill me if I told the truth. She probably didn't even know what I knew already. I watched Vegeta, he didn't look like he believed my cover up. Hell, I wouldn't even have believed it. I prepared to get the truth beaten out of me. To my surprise I was dropped. I landed on my hands and knees; coughing and gasping for air. 

I glanced up, Vegeta looked spaced out. Knowing an opportunity when I saw it I fled. Praying all the while that I would not be followed. 

****** 

I touched down in front of the capsule house. I was safe. If Vegeta hadn't followed me immediately he wouldn't follow me later, hopefully. What a day. I was seriously doubting it could get any better from here. 

I walked up to the door and entered. Quiet, which was a blessing. I rounded the corner to the steps and started up. My luck ran out at the top. Zoe. I cringed and felt guilty. I didn't want to see her yet. 

"Hey Celine, are you okay?" 

"What? Uh...yeah, I'm okay." I was somewhat surprised. This was not what I had expected. "Aren't you angry, I mean...I did almost try to kill you." 

Zoe shrugged. "You didn't do that on purpose, it was the shot (bless her for being so forgiving). Um...where have you been for the past two...," she trailed off. "Um, Celine?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Did you uh...notice anything unusual?" 

I shrugged. "No, why do you ask?" 

"Because you have a...," she trailed off again and her eyes widened. "Celine! Behind you!" 

Before I could turn an incredibly sharp pain assaulted my senses. I couldn't help it, I screamed and fell. A knee jammed into the small of my back. 

"Well," rumbled a male voice, "it looks like you're a real Saiyan now." Raditz sounded pleased with himself. 

"What are you talking about?" I hissed through clenched teeth. 

Zoe tried smacking Raditz, but he simply shoved her away. He chuckled, not a pleasant sound. "You mean you haven't noticed? You've grown a tail. A nice one at that." 

I snarled and then gurgled as the pain intensified. "Don't snarl at me wench. You should appreciate what I'm doing. I'm teaching you something every Saiyan should know. Always watch your tail. Keep it wrapped around your waist. If you don't...others will take advantage of your weakness." With that he loosened his grip and let my tail slip free. 

I scrambled to my feet and faced him, my new appendage lashing behind me. I glared at him. He looked amused and...something else. An emotion I couldn't identify. Then he laughed and walked away. 

Zoe walked up. "I'm sorry, I tried to warn you Celine." 

I curled my new tail around my waist. "No problem. It wasn't your fault. I just wasn't keeping my guard up. Thanks for trying to help me back there." I broke the conversation off and walked into my room. 

After I had closed the door firmly behind me I unfurled my new problem from around my waist to examine it. The fur was soft and silky, not at all like the coarseness I had imagined Saiyan tail fur to be. It was very sensitive too. That sensitivity could invoke pain or pleasure. From my new experience I anticipated it would bring more pain than pleasure. I remembered to curl my tail back around my waist. Despite the manner the advice had been given I decided to follow it. Better safe than sorry. 

****** 


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the DB/Z/GT characters (I wish I did, but I don't). They are not mine, they belong to Akira Toryama (I give up on the spelling because no one informed me of the proper spelling)/and associates/ or Funimation. Please don't sue me, I'm not making any money off of this. I'm just doing this for fun. I do own the characters Celine and Zoe, they're mine because I created them. Chelsee belongs to Turles (I transferred ownership of her to him because he threatened to beat me up if I didn't). 

Author's Note: Refer to Chapters 1 and 2! Please enjoy and COMMENT, thank you. Usual out of characterness applies here too (though it's a bit more extreme here). 

Warning: A bit of cuteness in this story...don't read if you have sensitive stomachs. 

---------------------------------------------------- 

Weeks passed and the usual regimen was followed. I trained with Raditz and Zoe went shopping. One thing had been added though. Turles was seeing more of Chelsee. The two were becoming quite the couple, in spite of all Turles' denials that they were not. Raditz and I ribbed him mercilessly about it. At least we did until he beat us senseless in retaliation. 

The traditional routine was broken one day when we got mail. Which was unusual, considering we didn't have an address. It turned out Bulma finally found out what I had sensed on that "unfortunate" day. She was pregnant; with a girl. We were all invited to a party at Capsule Corp. to celebrate the occasion. Fortunately, the event was not formal. But some decorum was required. This left us with one problem. 

****** 

I approached my target and main problem. "Raditz," I crooned. 

He blinked at my unusual use of his real name and went on the defensive. "What wench?" he asked suspiciously. "You're interrupting my target practice." 

I looked at the smoking tree stumps on the other side of the stream. Damn, I had liked those trees. I decided to cut right to the problem. "You know that party we're all going to tonight?" 

He hesitated. I could tell he could sense some sort of trap. "What about it?" he grumbled indifferently. 

"You need to take a bath for it." I remarked bluntly. 

"WHAT!? I don't need a bath!" 

I sneered. "Sheesh, what are you? Nose blind? You stink, you need a bath, AND you OWE me." 

He froze. "I don't owe you anything!" 

"Yes you do. What is it about a bath any ways? You afraid of water or something?" Perfect barb, imply to a Saiyan that he's afraid of something. 

"I am not afraid of water! How dare you tell me, a Saiyan, that I'm afraid of anything! And I don't owe you anything either!" 

Just as he finished his "speech" I tackled him into the stream and dunked him. He came up spluttering and then returned the favor. The next hour was spent scratching, biting, and scrubbing. In the end we were both covered in soap and bruises. 

I wiped the soap off my nose and dunked him one last time. I laughed as he came up for air. "Well, at least your clean now." I climbed out of the stream and immediately got yanked back in. I came up gasping. "That's it, you've had it Radish!" I lunged at him. This started a water fight that lasted the next hour. 

****** 

I felt waterlogged. Two hours in water makes you look like a raisin. Raditz opened his mouth to make another threat. I splashed water into his mouth to make him shut up. While he was coughing I climbed out of the stream again. I powered up to dry myself off and jogged into the house. Almost time to go. 

I glanced back as Raditz walked in. He snapped at me, "I suppose you want me to put something special on too?" 

"I could care less what you wear. If you want someone to suggest cloths to you go talk to Zoe." I walked upstairs to change into a different T-shirt and pair of jeans. Then I grabbed the portable video camera Zoe had recently bought. I thought she might want to use it sometime during the party. 

I came downstairs to wait for Zoe to come back from shopping and Turles to come back from picking Chelsee up. I sat down at the kitchen table. I wasn't going to eat. There would be food at the party. Raditz doesn't share my philosophy. He ate whenever he was hungry. At the moment he was hungry. He flopped down across from me with his pile of food and started to eat. 

One thing that I'll never be able to ignore is the way Saiyans eat. The way they inhale food is just sort of mesmerizing. I watched him eat. "You know, there is going to be food at this party." 

"Good, then I won't starve while we're there." 

I was bored so I decided to play my favorite game; "How much can I annoy the Saiyan?" "Why do you eat so much?" I asked. 

"Huh?" 

After I didn't get a more intelligent answer I began to stare at him while he ate. From what I've seen, Saiyans (or at least Raditz) think of staring as a dominance challenge. Raditz fidgeted and tried to ignore me. He picked up a piece of fruit and started to bite into it. Then he glanced up. My staring was starting to bug or unnerve him. I wasn't sure which. He stopped eating and glowered at me. Out of the corner of my eye I saw his tail unwind from his waist and the tip start to flick. 

The door opened and Zoe walked in. "Hey guys, what are you doing?" 

I grinned. "Nothing much, ready for that party?" 

"Sure! I want to take that video camera though." 

"Already have it. We just have to wait for Turles to get here with Chelsee." 

Zoe rolled her eyes. "I don't see why he just doesn't admit it. He really does like her." 

I laughed at this. "Do males ever admit anything even remotely resembling emotions?" 

By now Raditz had gathered his food together and left the room to avoid the conversation. I can't say I blamed him either. 

I heard the sound of arguing coming from outside. Chelsee and Turles were here. From what I heard, Chelsee was winning the argument. I silently cheered her on. 

Zoe looked excited. "C'mon, let's go! It's time to party!" She headed out the door and I followed her out. 

"Hey, what's the hurry? It's not like you're going until I'm ready to go." I flicked the tip of my tail in amusement. 

"I can always harass you until you are ready." 

"True, too true. Well...c'mon then, let's go." I turned to the capsule house. "Hurry up or get left Radish!" I picked up Zoe and lifted off the ground, Turles doing likewise with Chels. When Raditz finally decided to "grace" us with his presence we headed off to Capsule Corp. 

****** 

We arrived at about the same time the Son family did. I glided down with Zoe and went to greet them. All of them looked a bit surprised upon seeing the tail. Though I'm sure Bulma had already told them about what had happened. 

Goten looked a bit more curious than surprised though. I unwound the tail from my waist and crouched down as Goten came a little closer. 

"Where'd you get that?" he asked curiously. 

I grinned. I dunno why, but I had always liked this squirt a lot more than any of the other DBZ kids. "One night it just grew, and when I woke up that morning I saw it." I held my tail around in front of me so he could take a closer look. 

"Neat, what's it for?" 

I smiled and swished the tail back and forth slowly. "Well, it's not really good for much except...." 

"Except what?" He looked really curious by now. 

"Tickling!" I tickled the squirt for about a minute while the Sons looked on in amusement. Raditz looked completely disgusted. Mercifully (for Goten and the reader's stomachs) I stopped and he continued to giggle and laugh. I picked the kid up and set him on his feet. Then we all went inside to the party. 

****** 

The entire DBZ gang was there and I mean everyone. Though it was truly unusual to see some of these people at a party. The fact was I had never met most of them up close and personal. I only knew those who went over to Goku's home on a regular basis. Because of this Bulma dragged Zoe and myself around for introductions. 

Everyone was pleasant to a certain degree. Though in Zoe's very vocal opinion some needed to learn how to say hello instead of just grunt. 

After the introductions I wandered around to talk and snack. Bulma must have hired caterers, because the food was excellent. In about an hour I finished with the necessary socializing and headed over to the food table for the main course. It was time for some serious eating. I pushed my way through the other Saiyans and helped myself. Then I headed towards a couch to sit and eat in "peace." I munched while I watched the party goers. 

Bulma, the new mother-to-be, was being coddled and made much over by the other women. She looked like she was loving every minute of it too. The guys were all eating, drinking, meditating, or telling jokes to one another. I noticed Vegeta wasn't around. Unusual, or maybe not considering the circumstances. 

I heard giggling and turned my head. The two squirts were up to their old tricks again. I leaned over. "What're you guys up to?" 

They froze until Trunks finally spoke up. "Nothin'! We're not doing anything wrong!" 

Goten spoke up excitedly, "We're going to play a joke on Vegeta-san!" 

Trunks clapped his hand over Goten's mouth. "Nice going blabbermouth." 

Goten bit one of Trunks' fingers. Trunks jerked his hand away and flicked it back and forth. He glared at Goten. Goten glared back and continued. "We haven't even thought up a joke to play on him yet!" 

I interrupted, "Hey, can I help?" 

I grinned as the two kids tried to keep the shock from showing on their faces. "Well? Can I help you guys or what?" 

They looked excited. "Sure! What's your idea?" 

I leaned forward. "First, is Vegeta asleep?" 

Trunks nodded. "He said he'd rather be asleep than deal with this kuso party." 

"Good. Okay, this is an old trick but a good one. First, get some shaving cream. Then spray the shaving cream on the hand the "victim" normally uses. All that you do then is tickle the person's nose." 

Goten shrugged. "What's so funny about that?" 

Trunks whacked him on the back of the head. "Duh! When he tries to slap the tickle away he'll splatter shaving cream all over his face!" 

"Cool!" Goten laughed. 

"Want to make it funnier?" 

Goten and Trunks turned to look at me again. "How?" they demanded. 

I smirked, "I brought a video camera, I'll let you guys use it for your joke. I'd come with to help; but I'm not fast enough to get away from Vegeta." 

"Awesome idea!" 

I went over to get the camera from Zoe while the kids went to get the shaving cream. We met back at the couch. I handed the camera over to Goten. After briefly showing him how to work it the kids headed down the hallway. 

I took cover on the other side of the couch and listened for all hell to break loose. It started soon enough. 

I heard the sound of a slap, then Goten's cheerful voice called out, "Hey Vegeta-san! You're on Candid Camera!" 

An unidentifiable scream followed by horrendous cursing erupted from down the hall. Everyone at the party froze. Goten and Trunks shot by and flew out the door carrying the video camera. Vegeta exploded out of his room (literally) and took off after the kids. 

"What just happened!? And why did Vegeta have white stuff all over his face!?" Goku exclaimed. No one answered his question; no one really needed to. 

I listened to the receding sound of cursing and terrified screams. 

"Com back here with that tape you brats!" 

More screams and shrieks followed; then a short silence before two young voices simultaneously shouted, 

"FU-SION!" 

A shock wave rocked Capsule Corp. Then the ground started to vibrate from repeated explosions caused by the battle that had begun outside. 

Turles looked out a window and his jaw dropped. "What's happening out there!?" 

I fingered the tape that the kids had barely managed to slip me and smirked. Vegeta would never get his hands on it. Finally I answered Turles' question. "Vegeta is fighting Gotenks. Gotenks is the fusion of Goten and Trunks. By they way...," I held the tape up, "anyone want to watch a video?" 

****** 

I grinned, the party had been great. It was winding down and happily enough Vegeta still hadn't figured out where the video was. Even better was the fact that my two little accomplices had gotten away unscathed; which was surprising in itself. 

"I'm sick of this!" 

I turned to look at Zoe. "Sick of what?" I asked curiously. I couldn't see anything to be sick of; after all, Bulma hadn't cooked the dinner. Life was great at the moment. 

"I'm sick of this universe! I want to go home." 

Bulma approached, "I'm sorry you feel that way Zoe. Perhaps there's something I can do to help you." She thought for a few moments. "I know! Why don't we gather the dragon balls and wish you back home!" 

Zoe looked as though she might cry. "You'd do that for me!?" 

Bulma smiled. "Of course! You're a friend. Anything for a friend." 

"Anything?" Master Roshi inquired. 

"Shut up you dirty old man!" 

I coughed and looked the other way. I was NOT getting involved in this one. 

Bulma turned back towards Zoe. "We'll split into groups to gather the dragon balls quickly. That way we can send you guys back home in a couple days." 

****** 

The next morning we gathered in front of Capsule Corp. Perhaps it would be best if I defined "we." Goku, Krillin, Gohan, Yamcha, Puar, Trunks, Goten, Turles, Zoe, Raditz, and myself milled around waiting for Bulma to arrive. 

She did so soon enough. "Okay guys! We all know why we're here!" 

"We do?" Goku asked doubtfully. I grinned, same old Goku. 

"Goku...shut up," Bulma sighed and continued, "Let's organize this expedition. That way we can gather the dragon balls as quickly as possible. I'll organize each party so we can get started. Okay. First, Goku, Krillin, and Gohan will each go individually after a dragon ball. You'll each need a dragon radar so here you go." She handed each of them one of her rather amazing devices and they took off. 

Bulma turned to the rest of us. "Second are those going in pairs. Here are the pairs; Yamcha and Puar, Turles and Zoe, Goten and Trunks, and finally Raditz and Celine." She handed Puar, Zoe, Trunks, and myself a radar. "Take care of those. They're pretty difficult to make." 

"Why do I have to be stuck with Turles!?" 

Bulma sighed again. "Zoe, you know Turles won't hurt you. Remember what happens to him if he does?" Zoe nodded. "Good," replied Bulma, "then you don't have to worry about traveling with him." Zoe didn't get any more chances to complain after that. Neither did the rest of us. We headed off to find our respective dragon balls. 

****** 

"I don't believe I have to go with you to fetch one of those things. I have better things to do." 

I ignored my flying companion and looked at the radar. We'd been traveling in the direction that the mechanism had indicated for a couple days. Now, according to it, the dragon ball was just ahead. I looked up and froze. 

****** 

"Great, that's just great!" I looked at the smoking mountain in front of us. "It would have to be in an active volcano." I glanced over at Raditz; he looked disgusted with the whole situation. 

"Why are we doing this absurd waste of time again?" 

I grimaced. "To help Zoe I think. C'mon let's go. I want to get this over with." 

We headed over to the volcano and hovered over it. 

"Do you see it?" I shouted over the mountain's rumbling. 

"How should I know! I've never even seen a dragon ball before!" 

I groaned. "It's a small orange ball with red stars in it." 

"That's just great! We're looking for a small ORANGE ball in a crater filled with glowing ORANGE lava!" Raditz cursed under his breath. 

"Just shut up and look!" I retorted in exasperation. 

I got a growl in response. After we had both looked for a few minutes he spoke up, "There it is." 

My attention snapped back to Raditz. "Where?" 

He laughed. "It's floating around in the lava down there." 

"What!?" I answered incredulously and looked down into the lava. I didn't think dragon balls could survive such extremes! He was right though; there it was. Floating in bubbling hot lava. Doesn't this stuff ever get any easier? 

Raditz smirked and glanced at me. "Well? How're you going to get away with this one?" 

I scowled and then smiled as I remembered something. "Easy," I chuckled. 

Raditz's eyebrows shot up. "Easy?" 

I didn't answer; I was busy concentrating. I raised my arms over my head, rotated them down behind me, then brought them to the fore. I brought my hands together palms out and pulled them towards my chest. I completely focused my attention on what I was doing. Finally I thrust my hands forward. "Arctic Drain!" An icy blue beam of energy shot towards the volcano's crater. I watched as the beam struck the lava and started to solidify it. 

"Wench! You've been practicing an attack without me!" 

I smirked. "Really? What are you going to do about it Radish?" That deserved and received no reply. 

I floated down and stepped onto the now solidified and cooled lava. There was the dragon ball, imbedded in the stone. I leaned down and plucked it out. 

CRACK! 

I stiffened and looked around. The lava hadn't completely solidified! As I tried to take off, the ground quaked as the lava forced it's way through. I stumbled to my knees. Just before I fell through the thin crust into the magma I was jerked into the air by the back of my shirt. 

I looked down at the spot where I had been. Not a pretty scene. Then I looked up somewhat sheepishly. "Why Radish, I didn't know you cared." 

He flushed. "I don't wench, but if you die so do I." 

I grinned, "Sure Radish. Now could you let go of the back of my shirt?" 

He did so and we headed back to Capsule Corp. with our prize. 

****** 

When we returned we found only Goku and Gohan had managed to get back before us. We had to wait a couple days for the others to return with their prizes. In the meantime I gathered my few possessions together for the trip home and showed Raditz my new attack to pass the time. 

****** 

It was a clear sunny day when Turles and Zoe returned with the last dragon ball. It seems they had been delayed because they had gotten themselves stuck in an iceberg. 

****** 

The DBZ gang (including Turles, Chelsee, and Raditz) gathered in an empty field with us to keep the dragon summoning from bothering anyone and to say good bye. Sweet, but not really necessary. I don't think everyone there had gathered together willingly any ways. 

Bulma arranged the dragon balls in a circle and spoke the necessary words. The sky grew dark, the wind howled, lightening crackled, and Shen-Long finally showed up. 

"Flashy," I commented. The dragon spouted his typical spiel about granting one and any one wish to us. 

Bulma stepped forward, "I want to wish our two friends back to their world!" 

The dragon rumbled, "It can't be done, that would require two wishes. Not just one." 

Bulma gaped. "Uh...then I wish for you to create a temporary portal to their world for them to step through." 

"Very well, it shall be done." The dragon's eyes glowed crimson and a shining portal opened. 

Zoe cheered. "Yeah! We can finally go home! C'mon Celine, lets go!" She stepped towards the portal. She turned to look at me when I hung back. "Well? C'mon Celine!" 

I hesitated. Did I really want to go back? I mean, what was there for me in my universe? Sure, my parents and friends. But what else? I glanced at the gang. Here I also had friends, a family of sorts, and a sparring partner. I couldn't really be myself in my world any ways. I was no longer who or "what" I had been. I'd have to hide myself for the rest of my life. The only thing going for me back "home" would be my strength. I grinned, fact of the matter was that I would be the strongest person on the planet if I went back. It wasn't really enough though. I had to be in the place I truly loved and enjoyed. That wasn't over there, it was here. 

I turned to Zoe. "Hey, tell my parents that I love 'em and that I'm happy." 

"What!?" she spluttered, "You're not going back!?" 

"Nope, I'm not going back. I'm going to stay here." 

Zoe's eyes bugged out. "NO! You can't stay, you have to come back with me. Back home is where you belong. Besides, how am I supposed to explain this to your parents!?" 

I grinned. "You'll figure something out. Any ways," I pulled out the video and handed it to Zoe, "here's something to remember us by." Out of the corner of my eye I watched Goku attempt to restrain Vegeta. "Oh, and write a story about this weird adventure we've had when you get back okay?" 

"But Celine...," Zoe whimpered. 

"No buts! If you don't go now Vegeta will get loose and beat us BOTH up!" I shoved her through and watched the portal wink out of existance. "I'll miss you Zoe." 

"You're staying?" Gohan asked just as Vegeta struggled free. 

"Yeah," I replied and watched Vegeta warily. He stiffened and glared at where the portal had been, then he glared at me. 

With a loud "Hmph" he turned his back to me and flew away. I gave an inward sigh of relief. 

Gohan persisted, "Why are you staying here? Don't you miss your family and friends?" 

I thought for a moment. "Yeah, I miss them, but there was nothing for me over there. Here I can do something and be someone, it may not be much but I like it. Besides, if I went I'd never be able to get back. I don't think I could live with that decision for the rest of my life." 

Gohan nodded. 

"Besides," I grinned and flicked the tip of my tail, "I couldn't stand the thought of living in a place where sparring and fighting are nearly considered criminal acts in the public mind!" 

Gohan shook his head and smiled. "There certainly isn't any doubt that you are part Saiyan Celine." 

I inclined my head and smirked. "Why thank you Gohan!" He laughed and walked away. 

Turles snorted, "Nothing else to see here. Let's go." I watched as Turles and Chels left. I chuckled, whether he wanted to admit it or not; he and she were an inseperable pair (much to Turles' annoyance). 

Goku approached. Before I could react I was enveloped in a bear hug. 

"Urk! Goku, leggo! I can't breath!" 

"Hai! It's good that you decided to stay. Come over for dinner anytime you want to okay?" He grinned, "You're part of the family now!" 

I nodded. "Sure Goku-san, I'll take you up on your offer." I smiled as I watched my dysfunctional "family" lift off and fly away. Trunks flew off with the Son family to be with his friend Goten. Bulma and ChiChi didn't fly though. How could they? They drove away in an aircar. Everyone else slowly dispersed and left. 

I looked around the empty plain, one person left. He approached. 

"Hey Radish, looks like your stuck with me." 

"You stayed." 

Not a question, not a comment, not even a statement. It sounded more like an assurance to oneself (of course, once more this could have been wishful thinking). Once more that unidentifiable emotion flickered over his face. I think I was able to understand what that emotion was a little better. Another reason for me to stay in this universe. 

"Yeah, I stayed. I couldn't leave now could I?" 

Raditz snorted quietly, "And why not?" 

I smiled wryly and lifted off the ground. "I still have to beat the crud out of you some more." 

"Why you!" He lunged. 

Laughing, I dodged to the side. "Too slow. Now I know I'll beat you home Radish!" 

The race was on. The wind rushed through my hair and roared past my ears. This world was beautiful, clean, and free; my heart soared. It was wonderful. Glancing back I saw Raditz bare his teeth at me. I grinned back at him; it was good to be home. 

THE END (like HFIL it is!) 

-------------------------------------------------------------- 

Okay, so that's the end of my first fic. I know this chapter didn't exactly "fit" with the rest of the story. But it's my story so I did what I wanted to do. Well, I was thinking about doing a sequal to this story. I am going to write it any ways, but whether I post it or not depends on the responses I get for this last chapter. It won't be much of a humor story and I'd welcome ideas if anyone would like to send some in. It will also take me quite awhile to write it too. Later peeps! Thanks to all who were nice enough to read my entire story and comment. 


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